Magic – What Will ‘the Gathering’ Look Like in 2022?

Today, Magic’s official esports Twitter account sent out a link to this, an article that, while already short, can be summed up further with “Rivals and MPL are done this year, digital play is staying, and there are no current plans to support someone who wants to play Magic for a living outside tournament winnings.”

Coming from someone who remembers every iteration of Wizards supporting pro players, from writing a letter to get invited to the Pro Tour to the Masters system to the various Pro Player Clubs, my initial take was relief, and upon seeing other people’s takes, immense relief.

The consensus among many pros is that the idea of a Professional Magic player supported directly by Wizards is over. Matt Sperling retweeted this scathing essay from 2016, saying it still applies. Brian Kibler, years removed from Magic competitive play, released this, saying the game will still be there, but its secondary sources like content creation and brand building will sustain ‘professionals.’ LSV said a LOT of words here, but is far from a hot take. It may however have the truest statement from among the multitudes of voices tweeting about this with “…[Professional Magic] already ended for anyone not in the MPL three years ago,” which is kinda true.

My take, however, comes from a perspective of wanting to travel and play, but not have Magic be my source of income. Should I still hope to break even or at least not pay much to do this? Of course! Careful curation of collectibles and maybe winning a few games here or there will hopefully mitigate some costs. There are countless players out there who existed at or adjacent to where I floated when I played more actively(and have been hoping to come back to for over a year now), players who played PTQs, travelled usually regionally, and sometimes spiked an event and got to play in a PT or won some cash. Those players, who make up a reasonable segment of the paying player base, have been left behind.

From this standpoint, things can appear hopeful for the future. Sure, GPs and PTs may turn into weird festivals(MagicFESTs) where there’s more going on in terms of Magic culture, like meeting people, casual play, artists, cosplayers, and general Magic celebrities. But I can’t imagine a large gathering(lul) like this being completely devoid of Organized Play. There will still be main events to play in, but in the future I see, while many events will still qualify you for a larger one, there won’t be anything related to direct financial support outside tournament winnings. You might still do well enough in a year to get some free invites next year, don’t expect appearance fees or anything like them.

I could be wrong and my enjoyment of the game without real competitions will truly be tested. Still, even if the outcome is on the darker side, my prospects will likely be better than when 99% of the competitive population was locked out of being a professional when the MPL was formed.

I’m still very sad about how all this has come about. Magic is made, sold, and played differently than 5-10 years ago, and the direction is not one I like overall. This, however, could be a good thing.

Here’s hoping.

:EDIT: There’s a livestream today at 2pm with a Q&A on the new direction. Hopefully there will be some answers there at twitch.tv/magic

Path of Exile – How to Not Drown

Recently my good friend Gilgamesh102 jumped into the very deep pool that is Path of Exile. For those who aren’t in the know, PoE is an action RPG with some incredibly complex systems, including a massive currency system, complicated crafting mechanics, a skill tree with over 1325 nodes, and years worth of end game mechanics from various leagues all piled together. Gilgamesh102 has asked me for some tips. I am a player with over 1000 hours in-game, and while I still consider myself a journeyman in terms of expertise, I can gladly share some opinions.

Floaties or No?

There are two ways to experience PoE for the first time. If you jump in this pool without any support, you are probably going to drown, aka build a character that cannot reach what many consider the start of the end game, the map system. This is what I did. I did almost no research because I found it all way over my head, and just did what seemed right. I learned quite a bit, but felt frustrated that I had ‘wasted’ my time.

Now, that notion is a little silly since I’m playing a video game, it’s all kind of wasted time. But the next league I played, I struggled through following a guide I didn’t fully understand, and had quite a but more fun by the end. I had also progressed far further into the end game than I anticipated, and started to realize the vast scope of the game. I used to tell people that every 10 hours of gameplay I realized I didn’t know anything all over again.

Those periodic discoveries drove me to play more, so I can’t advise that someone do literally ALL the research and never experiment or try stuff, some things you’ll want to learn on your own. But for starters, I do think not building a bad character is more important than an organic experience, so pick a guide from Poe Builds you are interested in. These guides assume you know more about the game than you do, but pick one anyway, and follow it as best you can. The important things to follow are the skill tree and if they recommend different gems while leveling. This Storm Brand build from thi3n is the first guide I ever followed, and it has actual step by step instructions on what to buy and use throughout the campaign. Storm Brand has changed a lot since I used this guide, so YMMV.

Freestyle Tips

Even if you decide to press out on your own, there are still a lot of things you should know that a guide generally won’t provide.

First, there are a few 3rd party apps/add-ons you’ll eventually need. First, download Path of Builder, it’s a character builder that most guides use to show the skill tree and various metrics, don’t worry about all the crazy simulation stuff you can do for now. Next get Filterblade’s newest loot filter. Don’t mess with any of the settings, just link your PoE account and make sure you save it(or download it and stick it in the right folder on your desktop). This game drops so much loot you will eventually need a filter to be able to see shit. You don’t NEED the filter right now, but you’ll thank me later.

Next, make sure the character you’ve made is on Ritual League, and not Solo Self Found or Hardcore. If they aren’t bite the bullet now and switch.

While playing, gear choices aren’t as important early as skill tree and gem decisions. You can compare items if you like, but mostly they just get replaced quickly enough it isn’t worth the effort.

Don’t pick everything up. Sure if you’re barefoot pick up some boots, but looting everything will take forever, and as you’ll eventually learn, unless you’re just grinding out early currency for some reason, most white and blue items aren’t worth selling to vendors. Really all that stuff gets you are wisdom scrolls and orbs you generally sell for wisdom scrolls, so if you’re set on those, leave the litter on the ground.

When you get to a new area, hit “u” to look at the world map, if the place you’re at has a faint glowing bit in the circle, there’s a waypoint(fast travel) there somewhere, and you should find it before leaving. I don’t know how many times I logged in after a late night where I abruptly went to bed to find I had to trek through zones I’d already been through because I missed a waypoint.

The league mechanic, Ritual, will appear in every zone. Do it if you want, but I would focus on getting through the campaign. It’s good to try if your gear needs upgrading, and frankly is pretty fun. Other league mechanics will eventually start appearing as well.

If you want to buy things, you can do so on the trade website. Don’t worry too much about it early, as unless your build mentions getting something specific, you won’t need to use this. if you want to SELL however, you’ll need a premium stash tab, and this is where the monetization of the game comes in. Don’t buy anything right away, PoE does a good job of letting you organically realize you WANT a tab of some sort. This storefront is available in-game and shows the tabs you can buy. You’ll want to wait until they go on sale, which is relatively often. Then, if you’re going to buy anything(no one plays this game regularly without at least a few, I couldn’t imagine it), buy a currency tab and one premium stash tab. If you’re going deeper, get a map tab, and a fragment tab. Ignore the others, I bought like all of them and while I don’t exactly regret it since I put 1000 hours into this game, I don’t really use them. Do NOT buy regular tabs, they cost more to upgrade than just buying a premium straight up.

Use the global chat. Sure, there’s trolls and jerks, but if you ask a question you will probably get a reasonable answer the majority of the time.

Typing all this made me look back at my countless hours spent and feel pretty good. I know I likely missed some obvious stuff, and as more mechanics appear the game’s complexity will ramp up, so feel free to reach out in the comments with questions, or, if you’re Gilgamesh102, you know where to find me.

Delve rules.

Writing Because I Have To

I used to be different, better even.

I played cards, and I wasn’t bad. I enjoyed life, and didn’t live from one upswing to another. I used to be a writer, and I wasn’t bad at that either. I shared my experiences with whoever wanted to read them, but really I wrote for myself.

The last decade has really taken a toll on me, but the decisions that have led me here really go back farther than that. I used to think that my unceremonious exit from competitive Magic was some great fall from grace, but it’s not like I was entrenched there. The PTQ I had won to then tank in Montreal and later Pittsburgh was the only one I played in the entire year. Yes, I had drafted a LOT on MTGO, which is what enabled me to win that PTQ, but I was drifting away from the game and towards trying to build a life with my now ex-wife, a series of decisions that stretch all the way back to 2006 when I did well at a PT and was invited to the next one, but used the prize money to buy a car and start delivering pizza, which I then did for seven years.

I know that statement paints me in a poor light. What loser doesn’t have a car? It actually gets better. I was living in my girlfriend’s mom’s basement at the time. The trifecta red flags of someone who doesn’t care about much in life, and certainly isn’t thinking about the future.

I have regretted that decision, to throw away what I had earned to try and build a life with my partner. I used to justify it with our accomplishments. We moved out of the basement, and into a nice apartment. I eventually got a decent car and started working for Pepsi. We got married, and bought a house. We had our son Alexander.

Like most relationships, however, ours wilted and neither of us tended to it well. We had been slowly growing apart, and eventually we agreed to file for divorce. Suddenly, everything I could point to that justified giving up my then-dream was gone(except my son of course). He still makes it all worth it, but he’s not always around.

I can’t shake the feeling that that one decision was the defining moment of my life. That if I had went to the next event it would have catapulted me into the world I wanted to be in. Travelling, competing, and sharing my experiences, hoping that anyone who read it would be inspired to try to do what I managed to do.

Or it’s just bullshit because it’s a goddamn card game and I just got lucky a few times.

So here I am, writing bullshit no one wants to read because frankly, I have little to say that matters. The only reason I did this at all is because I set a weekly goal for myself to write at least a little bit each week. These goals are sort of interesting, because they aren’t all like “Exercise and eat right,” well, some are, but looking at how I’m going to iterate on them entering week three of 2021, they are actually guidelines that nudge me towards being a person I want to be rather than who I have been in order to survive.

It’s been an hour, this sucked. Maybe I’ll be back in a week.

Fallout 76 – Choices Matter, a Sample Redesign

I’m just gonna come out and say it.

The gear in Fallout 76 is incredibly boring, and is the number one design choice damaging the long-term health of the game.

In most games as a service games with a good amount of loot, the drops are interesting, and have a wide variety of useable and different purposes. In Path of Exile, the loot is so complex it requires third party programs to help analyze what a given drop will do for a character. In Destiny, the loot tends to have tangible and obvious effects that define how you play the game.

Fallout 76’s gear drops are extremely binary. Either it’s unusable or it’s god-tier, and that’s just lazy design, and I was bored at work today, so I created a very simple sample of how gear could be organized to make the game more interesting in terms of choices.

To be clear, I operate under the assumption that this sort of redesign will never come to pass because Fallout 76 will forever be shacked to the fact that it is basically a port from Fallout 4, and will always have issues from that lineage.

Concept

This redesign has a few core tenets

• More viable legendary effects
• Eliminate the strict hierarchy of primary armor mods
• Make choosing how strong an armor you want to use interesting

Armor generally no longer has a primary mod that provides extra DR. Base armors will still have their own values based on type(Robot, Leather, Raider, etc.) and the three levels of armor (base, sturdy, heavy) determine the exact DR and the types of mods you can attach to them. Having mods specific to legs,  chest, helmet, and arms can still exist, but are not a part of this redesign.

This is a quick and dirty list of how mods could be assigned. For the most part these are all existing mods, or mods that would be obvious to add to  these groups.

Light Armor

• Max AP
• Refresh AP
• Sneak Bonus
• Move Speed

Medium Armor

• Pocketed
• Asbestos Lining
• Reduced Stagger
• Ultra-Light Build

Heavy Armor

• Lead-Lined
• +HP/END
• Reduced Explosion Damage
• Extra Melee Damage

As you can see, there are trade-offs for having either more protection or less. It just makes sense that someone who is faster, has more action points, or is harder to detect has lighter armor, and someone who has a heavy lead lining or plating designed to reduce explosion damage would have heavier armor.

To add to this concept, there could also be set/type bonuses for wearing a full set of a type. For example, Having a full set of light leather armor could provide an increased effect of all mods worn in the set.

Legendary Effects

Legendary effects are getting a major overhaul. Currently, the prefix star found on all legendaries determines the most major effect, like Explosive or Anti-Armor, and the most coveted three star legendaries are often only marginally better than their one star versions. Also, legendaries will never have actively bad perks. Lookin’ at you, Berserker.

The new legendary system will be based on how Destiny and Destiny 2’s exotic  system worked. When you’re using a powerful three star piece of armor, it should have a tangible and obvious effect.

Now, one star legendaries will have the most minor effects, two stars will have a more powerful but still sort of generic effect, and three stars will have build defining and powerful effects.

Here’s a sample breakdown of how that could look.

One Star

• Reduced Weight
• Increased Durability
• Extra Disease Resistance

Two Star

• Auto-Stim
• Life-Saving
• Indesructible

Three Star

• Solar Powered(+Energy DR, + Energy Damage, Energy Damage Aura, increased effects during the day)
• Chameleon(better sneak per piece)
• Cloaking(lasts longer per piece)
• Regenerating(HP or AP or Durability
• Nocturnal(Sneak Bonus, Crit Bonus, +Melee Damage, increased effects at night)

Of course, legendary perks would need far more refinement than I’m willing to put in personally, but you can see the concept of how armor goes from just being there to mattering, and making the choices between them more interesting than just looking at a few numbers.

I hope to see an eventual design pass like this in 76, but frankly, I’m not holding my breath. If they can’t get Drills out of the loot table, I can’t really see anything near this scope taking place for armor, weapons, or perks.

Good luck out in Appalachia!

Better Lucky Than Good: A Fantasy Rant

I don’t know where else to fucking vent about how much bullshit fantasy football can be, so I’m doing it here.

Here’s the standings with PF and PA after two weeks. Week three is not factored in this photo but the results will be included in the narrative below:

You don’t really need to analyze it, I’m gonna fuckin’ do it for you. It’s just there as a proof.

First, a few simple yet infuriating facts:

The two teams with the most PF are two of my opponents so far.

I have the 3rd most PA overall.

The three teams with the most PA have NO wins.

Of the top five teams for PF, I am the only team with no wins.

Now, let’s dive in a little, with the knowledge of what happened this week:

I would have beaten over half the league in each of these first three weeks.

I have twice in three weeks played the highest scoring team.

I am very likely as a result to move into the top four for scoring, still winless.

The five teams with the fewest PF have four wins among them.

The bottom two teams for PF still have two wins.

So, let’s synthesize:

Yes, it’s only three weeks, so statistically none of this is relevant, but anecdotally, which is all that actually matters here, it is very important.

Given that the two shittiest teams by PF have two wins and the unluckiest three teams in PA have NO wins, it’s clear that I am the unluckiest team in the league, by virtue of playing teams when they post good numbers. Being shitty and posting barely 100 points a game has still earned our two worst teams wins. My PF is almost irrelevant.

People in my league, whom I trust, keep telling me my team is good, but frankly, I do not think it matters as much as just fucking being lucky. Sure, if we played 1000 games the better teams would win out, but with only 11 games in the regular season being lucky as at least as important as being good until you reach the playoffs. Even then…

One of those same people said there should be a H2H matchup every week, with an additional win or loss based on whether you were in the top half of PF that week. It would go a long way to curb bullshit starts like this, where a team that has performed each of the first three weeks is basically done for the year unless they get lucky on a magnitude at LEAST as much as their previous bad luck.

It’s midnight, I don’t feel any catharsis from this, fuck me I’m going to get a beer. Good fucking night.

Hearthstone: A Breakup Letter

Hi.

I know we haven’t talked in a while, almost three weeks now when the zillionth season started, and I found myself in the same spot I’ve been for years: working a ladder I don’t like to live a rank that I never wanted.

Where have I been? Well, the truth is I just stopped.

Not cold turkey mind you. I could never just quit you, not after almost five years of devotion. No, I went along like nothing was wrong, but I had stopped caring. If I didn’t complete a quest, I barely noticed. I had a challenge a friend quest sit in the log for over a week. That was when I knew this wasn’t going to get better.

A long time ago I think we wanted the same things. Good, relatively simple games without the overwhelming amount of maneuvering that most games have today. An Arena system that didn’t have so many cards in so many buckets. A ladder not so full of binary archetypes. Sets without so many legendaries, and set design that wasn’t so heavy-handed, where the vast majority of good decks were known quantities from the moment the set was released.

You’ve changed, and maybe it’s for the best, because now more people like you, even if I like you less.

That’s not the end of it though. There’s someone else. We haven’t been together long, but they remind me of how I used to enjoy exploring a format. Also, they don’t ask nearly as much of me. If I play, they shower me with cards and gold at more than a reasonable pace, and there are so many formats to choose from!

Then again, we haven’t been together long, and this day was coming regardless.

So that’s it then. I’ve said my piece, for better or worse. I know you don’t care with all your adoring fans, and I’ve been f2p for weeks anyway, so things probably won’t be different for you. This letter is just to sort out my thoughts.

Starting From Scratch, Again

Every so often I’m reminded that the written word isn’t dead, and that the medium can convey in a timeless fashion when others fall short or don’t seem appropriate. Every time I’m semi-inspired to pick up this blog, a project I thought I would maintain regularly throughout my life.

This time, it was actually two pieces that made me miss writing. One, Tim Aten’s GP Minnesota Non-report, where he goes over basically everything that happened away from the tables at GP Minnesota. And two, Matthew Berry’s final Love/Hate piece for ESPN, where I read maybe 5,000 words of storytelling before sorta just skimming the football analysis.

In both works above, the thing that really tugged at me was how they both sought to be informative(though Tim’s was decidedly NOT a strategy article), but incorporated events from their own life that were secondary or even just barely related to create a narrative that accompanied the meat and potatoes.

Even though not everything I’ve written was informative, all my best stuff were heavily inspired by actual events, if not straight re-tellings.

So here I am, trying to get the rust off, and deciding what to even write about. I guess this can just be a catch up post. A lot has happened since I was a regular writer.

I suppose the ‘real life’ stuff should come first.

I got married, bought a house, had a kid, got divorced, sold the house, still have the kiddo half the time. During that time I worked a job that demanded all of my effort, and was too tired when I got home to do any real content creation. Since the rest of my life fell apart, I figured I never liked that job much anyway, and so I quit. I have basically time-traveled back about six years. I work part time at a game store, and I live in the same apartment complex I did then.

Coincidentally, six years ago was my last Pro Tour, which outside a short descriptive essay about the hooker hotel I stayed in, I did not write about because I was sick and went winless, going back my crummy room long before I was out of contention. After that, I 0-3’d a Grand Prix after having won a GPT, and that was basically the end of my Magic career. I did get to shake David Williams’ hand though. It was incredibly soft for those wondering.

My life has been mostly downhill since. As stated above, I decided to really commit to some non-gaming projects, and save one they all ended in disaster. The last thing to go was my job, and I’ve spent the summer draining anything I had socked away in an effort to recalibrate my life, but I think I’m looking at things the wrong way. I keep looking for some magical event that will fix everything.

See, I’ve been unhappy for a long time. It’s just who I am, and the depth of that is a topic for another time, maybe never. But being a competitive gamer helped cope with it because of the highs and lows involved. When I got a positive outcome at an event, even a local one, I was able to feel pretty good about myself for a while. The magnitude of the win correlated with how long I felt alright. When I lost, sure I felt bad, but not too much worse than my neutral state. This went on for maybe a dozen years, until I left competitive gaming, and tried to play just for enjoyment.

It didn’t work.

In six years, I’ve developed some bad habits trying to get away from my neutral state. I’ve spent many nights drinking and playing meaningless games against faceless opponents to try and recapture how I used to feel, but it’s unhealthy, and a waste of time really. I never woke up the next day feeling any better about anything.

That’s sort of where I am mentally. Yeah, it seems worse when it’s all written out like that.

I have a few embers burning that might end up being something though, something to pour myself into, something I can believe in.

I have a Hearthstone podcast called Brewmasters. We’ve been going strong for a while now, and it’s a decent listen.

I have a Twitch channel that I could maybe make into something.

The store I work at is awesome, and is great for me especially.

I love my son more than anything in the world. He IS my world, and speaking of that, my world wants to go to the pool.

See you around.

Avengers: Infinity War Review (Super Small Spoilers)

First, I’m going to try to write this short review without spoiling too much, in case someone stumbles across this piece accidentally, and to cater to that small crowd who enjoys reading a review before seeing the movie.

It’s that small crowd who likes knowing a little bit about the future I want to focus on to start. Really, in some ways, we are ALL part of that crowd in a meta sort of way. We all know that there’s going to be a second movie in the Infinity War series, and we all know a few things about the plot structure of a multi-part movie series. Thanos won’t be beaten in the first half, and there needs to be a problem that either remains or appears to drive the plot from one movie to the next.

For example, in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1, the movie ends with Harry and company resuming their efforts to find the remaining horcruxes(an existing problem), while Voldemort acquires the Elder Wand(a new problem). The link between HP and Infinity War is that while in both cases we know generally speaking what will happen, it’s the ride to arrive at that point that’s enjoyable.

I’m happy to report that while it wasn’t altogether unexpected how Infinity War ends, I became willfully ignorant of the pending ending of the movie in a pleasant way, and was able to sit back and enjoy the ride. Most characters had sweet new abilities to show off, there were many moments where applause and even cheering erupted from the audience, and for the latter two-thirds, the plot advanced smoothly despite the huge cast of characters all interacting in new ways and being split up into multiple groups. Characters are killed when you expect them to live. In particular, Thanos’ motivations and personality were explored quite well. Movies with irrationally evil bad guys don’t really work anymore, and Marvel is pretty good at showing just enough of the mind of the antagonist to make him interesting.

That said, the movie is far from perfect. The first third was rocky as characters reunited or met each other for the first time, and Thanos’ lackeys, despite having lines and being in many scenes, are nameless baddies, and I only learned most of their names as the credits rolled. The humor falls mostly flat in the face of such a serious plot. The groups align against Thanos almost too quickly, and despite his massive perceived power, they have a high level of success in combat with him, though I’m tempted to give that a pass since Guardians of the Galaxy, the movie that established that even a single Infinity Stone can level a planet with ease, was quite some time ago. Some key events are trite or even nonsensical, and while they are easy to get past in the face of such great action scenes, they linger in the mind after the fighting is done.

I don’t really rate movies, as a rating system feels so rigid. I CAN say if you enjoy Marvel movies this is worth a watch. I mean, you’ve already invested dozens of hours, it only makes sense to see it through. I feel very similarly to how I felt about Star Wars TFA, the movie had a lot of character/prior movie red tape to go through to get to the good parts, and so it gets a pass in MANY areas, including that first third. The difference between A:IW and TFA is that I actually liked Infinity War, and want to see it again, and will 100% buy it when it comes to Amazon Video.

I’ll probably still watch Thor:Ragnarok more often though. It’s the most complete movie Marvel has ever made, from action to humor to soundtrack, and remains the benchmark for greatness.

Hearthstone – Witchwood Sleepers

In the days leading up to the release of The Witchwood, everyone has been submitting their reviews hoping to either be the guy who called Grim Patron, or the guy who gave Corridor Creeper one star. It’s true, I’m going to talk about some cards today, but these are the long shots, the cards that many are dismissing out of hand in favor of more obvious all-stars.

So basically I’m trying really hard to call the next Grim Patron. I’m not saying that will happen, but if nothing else these cards need a little more attention, as they appear playable in the coming powered-down Standard.

Ratcatcher

Rush is a mechanic we can’t fully understand yet. Arena experts claim its completely overpowered, and makes the game extremely swingy from turn to turn. Constructed players are a little more reserved, and they should be. Most of the rush minions aren’t very well statted, and Ratcatcher is no exception.

However, Ratcatcher could have some very favorable outcomes. Zoolock has very few options for retaking tempo outside Saronite Chain Gang, which is really just hoping your opponent can’t break through. If you’re losing the board, any trade you can make that leaves a man in play enables Ratcatcher to gain value, and it doesn’t take much to get there. Even gaining a measly +1/+1 can turn a board state back in your favor, and that’s the bare minimum. Having the ability to attack with a bunch of power essentially twice in a turn during a key turn can decide games.

There’s another way to leverage Ratcatcher for value. Eating minions with deathrattle like Devilsaur Egg can create a decent board pretty quickly. Combined with Sanguine Reveler there’s potential for a new style of Zoolock in Standard. Consider this shell:

• 2 Flame Imp
• 2 Witchwood Imp
• 2 Sangiune Reveler
• 2 Swamp Dragon Egg
• 2 Dire Wolf Alpha
• 2 Devilsaur Egg
• 2 Ratcatcher

I’m sure more cards could be added to this core, but these few cards showcase the potential power of Ratcatcher. Note how easy it is to double up on Dire Wolf Alpha bonuses, or create a 3/5 on turn one with coin using Reveler and the new Imp.

EDIT: Forgot to mention that this card is just bonkers with Power Overwhelming in Wild. Like PO wasn’t good enough already.

Mad Hatter

My argument for Mad Hatter is very similar to Ratcatcher. If you ever have the only guy or guys on the board, Mad Hatter is four mana for 6/5 worth of stats, though it may be even better than that depending on where the ‘hats’ land. Extracting value from this minion doesn’t seem tough, but I admit that it’s unplayable from behind. Still, most cards are bad when played from behind, so perhaps it ‘s not an issue. I could see this minion being played in any aggressive deck that seeks to never lose the board.

Hench-Clan Thug

I’m surprised the buzz for this card was low. A neutral minion that is basically a 4/4 for three mana that grows +1/+1 most turns is reminiscent of Undertaker before being nerfed. The weapons in this new Standard line up so that there aren’t many very good turn two plays outside Woodcutter’s Axe from Warrior, but Rogue will get plenty from this minion. Thug could also see play in the right Hunter deck because of Candleshot and Hunter’s ability to quickly apply pressure after taking a board.

Spectral Cutlass

Finally, we come to Spectral Cutlass, the longest shot of all those mentioned. During the reveal stream I was impressed at how long the Rogue could keep Spectral Cutlass alive, albeit having to make some tough choices. That may not translate to Standard, especially with the random nature of the Burgle mechanic, but with a little help and a lack of Oozes the Cutlass could become as important as top tier payoff cards like Murloc Warleader or Gentle Megasaur. Don’t sleep on just how much weapon support Rogue has right now. Between Doomerang, Rummaging Kobold, Cavern Shinyfinder, Deadly Poison, Cutthroat Buccaneer and others, there are the makings in the near future of a very powerful new archetype!

That’s all the time I have today, and with the set releasing tomorrow I’ll be diving into the new cards with gusto. This isn’t an article about archetypes, but if you’re wondering, besides the obvious I’ll be trying Weapon/Burgle Rogue, Rush Warrior, Odd/Quest Warrior, Zoolock, and Odd Mage. Note how all of these decks are either naturally aggressive or have a very specific plan in mind to win(except Odd Mage, which will probably durdle pretty hard). If you want to quickly climb after release, pick something with a plan and go hard!

Hearthstone – Competing Hegemonies

This will be a quick one even though there are plenty of reasons why Standard (and ladder in general) is shitty. I could talk about long-term problems like how Hearthstone is the ONLY game I can think of where the professional format isn’t a default format in the game (Conquest), or how Wild is going to be REALLY shitty for a while before it develops into what hopefully feels like Vintage Magic(broken, but still fun), or even how the pro scene is completely unsustainable because the money just isn’t there, and there’s no way a third party a la SCG could step in to create a semi-pro league because there’s nothing to sell, and sponsors only go so far.

No, I’m going to expand on a small rant I had on stream this week. Normally this rant would have appeared on Brewmasters, the Hearthstone podcast I’m on, but we said fuck it it’s the end of the month lets just stream instead.

In said rant I talked about why Standard is unfun, and I want to repeat it here with more clarity because I’m sure some listeners will misinterpret my unhappiness with the meta as unhappiness with the game in general. I LOVE Hearthstone. It’s replaced Magic, a game I played for two decades, as my primary source of competitive fun, and I want the game to continue to grow and improve, not just make $400 million a year for a few years then close up shop.

The primary reason we are all sick of Standard(and if you’re NOT sick of Standard, you’re not included. Christ, just let me generalize a little for rhetoric’s sake) despite having so many viable decks is because two polar opposite hegemonies are in a bitter, endless war with each other.

On one side, you have weapon-based aggro decks, mostly featuring Patches, the Shithead. Most of these decks don’t have many options against an opponent with any semblance of late-game, and this are forced to play as aggressively as possible.

The reason the Patches decks are so aggressive is because of their mortal enemy and competing ideology, the Reno decks. Many aggro vs. Reno games are decided on whether Reno Jackson or Kazakus are drawn in a timely manner, and other that those variables what actually happens during the game is somewhat moot.

And the dynamics that exist between these matchups are the problem at hand. As stated, aggro vs. control isn’t fun because a large chunk of games are literally decided by whether a single card is drawn in a singelton deck. Control vs. Control isn’t terribly fun because while you’re having interesting games, they have a tendency to revolve around Kazakus potions. The games also take forever, and so unless you sport an amazing win rate, you feel like you’re losing ground against aggro decks because they climb the shitty ladder system so much faster.

That leaves us with the aggro matchups. Sure, some of them are shit, like the Pirate Warrior mirror, but most of the Shaman mirrors are interesting, to a point, and especially so the Jade versions. There is a huge skill factor that weighs heavily on the outcome, and sadly is probably the high point of strategy in Hearthstone that doesn’t take 30 minutes to play out.

So if the meta sucks and the only interesting matchup is the Shaman mirror, isn’t the answer just for EVERYONE to play Shaman?

Well, yes, and that’s why Standard sucks. The end, see you in March or whatever.

P.S. I am aware I’m leaving out Miracle Rogue, Dragon Priest, and Jade Druid. None of these decks have better than even matchups against either Pirate Warrior or Aggro Shaman according to the Vs Reaper Report on 1/26. Maybe you think you’re a high-end player who can get more out of Miracle, but the data shows that once you hit legend, your matchups against PWarrior and AShaman get worse, not better!